Shree Goneshaye namho

suru korlam. ami chai na keu eta dekhuk karon dekhe aabar lokjon amake bhul bujhbe. hoyto ba ami nijei nijeke chini na. jetai hok bhul bojha bujhi hobei.keu amake bhalobashe na. amio bodhoy kauke bhalobashi na. i am all alone. amar konodini ayka thakte bhalo lagtona. keu amake bhalobashbe na etar theke kharap ba unwanted r kichhui chhilo na. aaj setai bastob. amar sotti mone hoy na aamar ostityer kono proyojon achhey ei neel prithibete. erokom onek manush achhey jader proyojonata furoyni, tader aponjonra tader k chaye kintu tader hoyto somoy sesh. erokom kauke amar oproyojonio somoy ta ki Ishwar diye dite paren na? amar kachhey jeebonta hell karon amar r kichhu korar ba dewar nei r ami ja chai seta konodini hobe na. jeeboner ordheker besi somoy ebhabei kete gelo. sobchey mojar kotha holo ami nijei nijeke chini na! er chey pathetic ki r kichhu hote pare?

baarir ayto rokom bibhinyo somosya but ami kichhui korte parina,kichchhoona. ei irritation ta amake jeno r o incapable kore dichchhey r joto somoy egiye cholechhe amake realise koriye cholechhey ami kotata okkhyom kotota oproyojonio. ami toh karu sathe mishteo parina. aajkal barir karu satheo amar kotha hoyna. othocho amar koto kichhu bolar achhey but ami boltei parina byakto kortei parina jeno bhasha hariye gechhey. na konodini subokta ba expressive chhilam na. infact konodini na. aaj hoyto tar churanto porinaam bhugchhi ebong eta kebol berei cholbe dine dine.aaj ami kebo jeta pari set holo -aykdom parina eta realise korte. eisob incapability amake hotash kore. ami rege jai r manushjon bhabe ami koto khitkhite. ami nijeo serokom bhabi. ami nijei nijeke ektuo bhalobashi na ba trust kori na. hote pare ami hoyto abnormal ba abnormal hoye jachchi. ami nijeke chini na. ami chhottobyaalr theke paribarik ayto somosya dekhte dekhte tader modhye thakte thakte klanto hoye porechhi. samne aro ondhokar. gado ondhokar. sei ondhokar hoyto ko nodini alor mukh dekhbe na r jedin thakbe sedin hoyto ami ondho hoye jabo. jeebon boro aschorjer.

ayto sober poreo kothao jeno sob kichhu theek mene nite parina. mone hoy hoyto sob kichhu theek hoye jabe, kono aykdin....infact kono ayk nikot (recent) muhuttye! soti, hoyto ami pagoli bote.

janina r konodino ekhane kichhu likhbo kina jodi nijeke chinte pari tahole hoyto journey ta ektu better hobe. sob kichhu kemon chhoriye achhey chardike. hatpa naratei parchhi na. gochhabo kemon kore? koto jol kada chardike..........pa barabo kemon bhabe? haat osaar othabo kemon kore/ samne gado ondhokar.....ghutghute ondhokar....bhoy korchhey khub! kibhabe uthbo, uthe alor sondhan korbo? er modhdhei ...ei bhibishika niyei morte morte bakidin gulo katate hobe? etai bhobitobyo? go haran here jete hobe jeeboner sathe? tobe sob ichha sopno sob kichhur kobor dite hobe. on a different note, tara ki aaj adou jibito achhey? khoj nebo kemon kore? ekhan theke to berotei parchhi na. gado ondhokar haridike................................asepashe keboli dhonshostup.kebol dhongsostup. tobu ami bhalo thakte chai r pachjoner moton kore, pachjoner sathe. i need a happy family, i really do. that will probably heal all my wounds. who knows!